I feel I have not poked enough fun a Islam in a while, its been at least three days. To make up for this time that I have given these Allah lovers off, here is my list of three things to do instead of getting a civilized divorce if you are a Muslim. All of these things have the inevitable outcome of a divorce minus the lengthily procedures of bribes and Sharia courts. By inevitable, I mean her death.
These are all things that are acceptable when interpreted from the Koran which is completely rational. Funny how most theism needs interpretation when the god that inspires said scripture is omnipotent. Its almost as if this god is not omnipotent. So without further ado.
The divorce lawyer and time saving list as recommended by the Koran:
1. Convince your wife that female suicide bombers go to heaven and that's she will have virgins to do all the work she normally has to do....after all you are a lazy slob.
2. When out walking with your wife, trip her so that she shows her ankle to passersby. Screech "ankle" if you do not see at least 50 % of the males grabbing their crotches.
3. Pay your friends to rape her, and enjoy beer on them when she gets stoned.
Maybe too dark these options, but nonetheless no one can claim I don't pick on Islam.